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Coming To CBS.com In January, 2016(Gary Vee Schism Chaser)

12 Oct

“Gary Vee-Schism Chaser”
An Intrepid News Correspondent & his team of Miss Denial, Paulie, & Pat, backed by. The Mysterious “Prefect For The Sacred Congregation For Doctrine & Finance”, seek and expose Enemies of “The Mysterious Prefect.”
Frodays at 23 Hours GMT, on CBS.com.

Kyrie Elaison

EWTN Acquires ChurchMilitant.com

24 Sep

EWTN has announced the acquisition of ChurchMilitant.com and its’ vast Library of Instructional Programming, with the Exception of “God First” with Fr Paul Nicholson, complaining that “Fr Nicholson is too unusual, even by Canadian Television Practices & Standards, which means that even CBC doesn’t want his programmes.”
“This Is A HUGE Moment for us here at EWTN”, proclaimed Raymond Arroyo, “What with Michael Voris’ Ability to tone down criticism of any Pope, even if that Pope proclaims that the Holy Trinity has 5 Persons.The new nightly Half Hour ‘Vortex’, should prove most interesting. And on EWTN Radio, Mrs Niles will have a two hour phone in show, titled ‘Whatever That’s Worth'(Acknowlegement Christopher Ferrara). These shows will be coming from The Brand New EWTN Ferndale Warehouse Studio” where both On Air & Web Programming will occur.”
The ChurchMilitant.com “Cub Reporters” declined comment, though Ryan Fitzgerald commented “Man, What Sellouts!”

Timothy Michael Cardinal Dolan, Archbishop of New York, breathed a Sigh of Relief, before exclaiming “BRAVO, Mike, We’ll Be Glad To Have Ya.”

M

Kyrie Elaison

A Broadcast Monitored In Windsor, ON

2 Sep

“Dear Anchor”, operating from a Warehouse In Detroit, MI, USA, while Weeping, Moaning and Criticising The Man in The White Cassock, under the Code Name of “Roma”, was knocked off the air after using words containing the letters “S, P & X.”
According to a Ms Denial, “Dear Anchor” is in seclusion for using “The Dreaded Four Letter Word, SSPX” and is on “Re-Educational Retreat”, somewhere under the Jurisdiction of O. D. Nichols, unbeknownst to Nichols ORDINARY.

Callers to SportsRadio 66(& 101.9 FM), did react “With Much Joy.”

LOL!

M

A Step Towards Full Communion With Voris?

2 Sep

http://www.churchmilitant.com/news/article/a-step-towards-full-communion

WHAT GAME ON FOX ARE YOU PEOPLE AT CMTV WATCHING?

Which callers to SportsRadio 66(& 101.9 FM) WFAN, are you relying on for “SSPX SCHISM UPDATES”?

Puh-Lease!

M

“Who Are The Cardinals You Spoke To, MR Voris?”

22 Aug

In the case of Michael Voris, he claimed that he spoke to Cardinals in The Vatican, who told him that the SSPX are in Schism.

Just WHO ARE THOSE CARDINALS, MR VORIS?

Are they as follows:
Ozzie Cardinal Smith, currently in Baseball’s Hall Of Fame;
Louis Cardinal Brock, currently in Baseball’s Hall Of Fame;
Robert Cardinal Gibson, currently in Baseball’s Hall Of Fame;
James Timothy Cardinal Mc Carver, in the Broadcasters’ Wing of Baseball’s Hall Of Fame;

Wait! These are former St. Louis Cardinals.
There is even an Actual Cardinal, a Jovial Cardinal Prince Of The Church, whose 1st Name is Timothy & he grew up in the RC Archdiocese of St. Louis. I know that he & you haven’t been on “Speaking Terms” since March 17th, 2015.

What other sources do you have?

Are they the assorted “Rocket Scientists” who call into SportsRadio 66(& 101.9 FM), WFAN in New York?

Keep this up & you’ll have all the Credibility of Al Sharpton in the Tawana Brawley Caper;

And THAT will be NONE;

For your Penance, may you be seated BETWEEN Joe Buck & Tim Mc Carver on FOX Saturday Baseball & forced to listen in SILENCE.

Kyrie Elaison!

M

“The Visitation” Of “Cheeriosinmypocket”

19 Aug

An Article in The Remnant Newspaper, regarding Mr Gary Michael Voris’ “Clarification” of Statements made by Bishop Athanasius Schneider in regards to the Society Of Saint Pius X , has generated a Proverbial Firestorm of Controversy, whereby 358 Comments were posted regarding Mr. Voris , and his “Clarification” of what was said by Bishop Schneider.

Like, WHERE is The Question asked of Bishop Schneider, Gary, in the email?

Like, WHY do I have the gut feeling that there was no email and no question? What happened is that Bishop Schneider didn’t give Gary Michael Voris what he wanted to hear, so a “Clarification” was invented to soothe The Bruised Ego of Mr Voris.

Oh, Poor Baby!

But, a significant part, of the comments was made by someone calling herself cheeriosinmypocket. She acted as if a shill for the group at “The Warehouse In Detroit“, and kept giving herself away as such, with a tone suspiciously like Mrs Niles.

Numerous people complained that Mrs Niles acts as the “Censor Pro Pax Voriscum.” There is no such thing as Discussion, unless it is of The Variety of Mr Voris’ Methane Emissions smelling like “Sweet, Fragrant Roses.” A few people identified cheeriosinmypocket as Mrs Niles.

Like just how PARANOID are they at the “Warehouse In Detroit” that people are engaged in actual discussion? Are they afraid of being exposed as Cultists?

Doesn’t Mrs Niles have better things to do other than patrol comboxes?

These are “Pretender Traditionalists Who Are Mere Neo Catholics.” Just how many times do these people plan on ripping Cardinal Dolan “A New One”, conveniently covering for his superior who does the same thing?

I guess as long as it sells US$10 Monthly Subscriptions. Save the US$10 Monthly Subscription Fee and put it to truly Traditional Catholic Journalism. What goes on at “The Warehouse In Detroit” is nothing more than a A Primetime TV Show From Secaucus, NJ in the Late 1980s.

Kyrie Elaison

M

“S, P, & X”, Banned By Neo Catholic Site

16 Aug

Neo Catholic Video and Content Site, RealChurch.com, has announced that the letters S, P, and X, are banned from any comments made in the comboxes.

“This is being done to combat the Heresy that the Society Of St. Pius The Tenth, is in any way, Catholic”, according to RealChurch.com Cub Reporter and Commentator Gerald Fitzryan.
“Taking Away Key Letters of The Alphabet, will render such defenders, both speechless and useless”, Fitzryan said from a Ferndale, Michigan Restaurant and Pub.

A. Claire Denial, a Senior Producer at RealChurch.com, who has an Internet Radio Program called “Whatever That’s Worth”, stated that “The Mockery of The Holy Father’s Message that the Society Of St Pius The Tenth are frauds and Apostates may never, ever, be questioned. This is absolute. Hence, those who use words containing the letters S, P & X, are making a mockery of The Holy Father.”

The Lead Producer and Host, Mr Gary Vee, speaking from the Ferndale Warehouse Studio of Toys and Gadgets, commented that “You must get with the Programme & learn not to question anything we say. If we say that Cardinal Dolan is Fat & Stupid, you are to agree with us. If we say that EWTN is run by Modernist Weenies, you are to agree with us. Realize that “The John, Mike, Louie and Chris Show” are all Sedevacantists and Schismatics, you have no choice but to agree with us. Daring to use words with the letters S, P, & X, show us here at RealChurch.com, that you are all Eternally Lost Souls who don’t Subscribe to us.”

A Host at the “John, Mike, Louie and Chris Show”, Chris, a Distinguished Barrister, commented that “It is time to actually put away the toys and gadgets, get away from the Ferndale Warehouse Studio and actually learn something about the subject that you are talking about. Barring the letters S, P & X from words in comments, speaks of Inanity and Immaturity. No Ms Denial, you have all the Faith of a Goldfish, which is NONE.”

A. Claire Denial was left utterly speechless.

M